tired-

as most of my gd friends know.
im quitting this job. my last day working in vivo tangs is on tues.
yes. this coming tues 300107..

sometimes i wanna leave immediately. yet sometimes i so she bu de.
if only hes not as kns. prob i can actualli stay until march.
why must he be so shit?
i guess life will actualli be really much better w/o him.
but what can i do? im not d only one suffering. everyone working there is.
but im sick of it.

i dont know bout you.
feel like a burden to you only..
i know you will leave me sooner or later.
its not tht i dont trust you. is tht i have no faith to be able to keep you..
im losing confidence in myself everyday. i dont know what to do to hold onto you.
i dont hold ppl back. this is me.
i let you go. though it hurts. like it always do.
but i know.
it will hurt really bad this time..

falling sick soon again.. probably cuz nwadays i slp at arnd 12+?
no choice. afternn shift i dont slp early. cuz i dont reach hm early. duhh?
but dont wry. i will try to take care of myself really.
if he dont kajiao me anymore :)

i so love e kid who hug my hand ytd in e lift (:
hes so sweet and cute lur! omg i so love him can.
e feeling is so undescrible.
he made my day really :D

why does everything seems so familiar?

fades.

alone- 9:51 PM

240107

i hope this will last forever.
ihy.

ifonlytimecanfreezetoo.

alone- 11:53 PM

lost-

kana pierced by a needle ytdytd. bleeded. cuz i was rushing to let e customer try e clothes.
scalded my hand today. bcuz i was using e steamer and e hot water just spilled out.
ouch. :(
din dare to tell you. dun want you to wry..

kinda losing confidence everyday. every now and then.
i say i will wait. but how long can i wait? i really dont know..

feeling so inferior compared to her.
shes first in position. im like 100+.
shes studying in e first class. im e third.
shes pretty got e shengcai. im not and i dont have.
shes e one motivating you. im like e one making you even slacker.
shes putting on braces. im still having e same old ugly set of teeth.
i really very scared. zhende...
so insecure all of a sudden.

waking up feeling so sad. so depressed this morning. weird huh. which i dunno why.
not my dreams. not last night. not ytd. so what isit?
i dont know lehx..
i just know my tears just welled up when i opened my eyes this morning.
mo min de shang tong..

what if one day we stop talking to each other le?
what if one day we stop working together le?
what iff..

aijiushiyifen

xinganqingyuan.

alone- 8:58 PM

我不知道为什么
心会这么的痛..

是因为你不好好地照顾自己吗?
还是因为她的缘故?
我真的不懂..

心里是很想和你在一起的.
只是我怕
我真的很怕她还在.
我也很怕我会受伤..

或许是我太自私了吧.
但在还没弄清事实前
我会尽量避免彼此受伤害.
这是为了你好. 真的..

为什么要让我遇上你.
好烦哦..

这只是一场意外吗?

alone- 11:42 AM

uhoh-

did i just did smth damn daring last night? -.-
cant believe tht. i sed it.
first time.
i sed smth like this..

will i regret? i dont know..
but isit better to regret on smth you have done
or to regret on smth you wished you have done.

i dont know i dont know. damn luan now.
argh..
where got ppl lidat one.. -.-
plx. let me act as if nth had happen.
wth happen to me :(

fate.
whats tht?

we nv know whats awaiting for us.
just..
breathe in. smile (:

i hope.

alone- 9:54 AM

sick ):

i hate it when im so vulnerable.
i hate it when i failed to take care of myself alone.
i hate it when i bring so much pain and trouble to e ppl arnd me..

i dont know why but it just happens too fast.
fever just came almost immediately. w/o letting me have e chance to find out why.
but hehx. it has gone dwn. :) but.. i suppose not really.
though i can jump arnd nw. not like how weak im ytd.
i do feel dizzy. still abit weak though..
but.. i dare not show it in front of you.
i dont want to make you upset. i dont want you to wry for me. though i dont know if you are joking or what.
i dont want to see tht expression on your face. it hurts. :(

wondering hows everyone now.
guess their orientation were over le bahx?
kinda miss them. but dunno how to face them laa. since im like d odd one out among them. lolx.
cant help but feeling abit.. out of place. hmm..

yupp. so my work life isnt as successful as i once tot how it would be.
theres more and more obstructions. alot obstacles in front of me.
i have to step over them. destroy them. or hack care them?
i dont know.
kinda fedup. pissed. troubled.
haix. so yaa. working society is really kns lolx.
argh..

tell me who to trust..

im afraid this will end soon..
you say. you will break promises.
right..?

thosememories/

ihopetimecanstop

now.

alone- 6:55 PM

010107 (:

its a brand new year ahead.
i shall work hard. i will work hard. and i MUST continue to work hard :D

its very special this year as i got e chance to countdwn with my friend
go sentosa sit cable car sit sky tower exp smth which i nv felt before.
and to get e chance of watching firework in front of me. :)
its weird to see sooo many ppl squeezing together just to catch a glimpse of e firework.
and i can say tht its really a special moment. :)

its sad to know tht this is my first
and prob e last time hanging out with gd friend out there till so late le.
alot of reasons.
mayb cuz im tired.
mayb cuz im scared.
mayb cuz i dont know le..

alright. so e beginning of a new year. i need to have some resolutions right? :)

/to put aside my sec school life. and to start anew.
/ive chosen a different route from many of my friends. but tht doesnt mean i cant live better. right?
/i will do my best in everything de. try everything. get e best out of it.
/cannot cry so ezily. cannot give up so ezily. must be STRONG.
/andandand. find a bf soon. LOL. jkjk laa! im not despo rofl. :P

finally.
happy new year friends (:


what if you search your whole life.
and theres no one out there?
adapted from jiamin.

thankyou :)

firsttime.

alone- 9:35 PM

huiyi (:
empathy0304
loyalty0506
happyfool
justthis-@hotmail.com
oweijoailubuodnemin

i just wanna be happy. :)

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