^^
long time din use this emotion liao..

had a beautiful night ytd. :) played the i dunno whats that called last night. :P those will got sparks come out one lorx. play wit cuzzins n dad. :) its fun. some of the sticks got noise one. like pop pop or smt lidat.. v loud jiu shi. i dun like that one.. i prefer the silent ones. :) jump arnd with that. draw hearts with that. lolx. first time in my life i played that. how noob.. =X finally i got to play that. after 15+ yrs. LOL..
i love that moment.. :)

went to chinese garden ytd. had fun playing wit my digital cam. but.. its not really clear though.. mum nearly made me cry. say rubbish to me. hello. its cny.. -.- why must she say all those.. i walk off. angry. strolling arnd chi garden.. its abit scary to be alone. but.. i just need time to think. to stop my tears from coming out.. u dunno how hard. no one noes..

ytd. was the last day i eating steamboat this yr.. =X cny. is ending.. :( nightmare. coming bac. u noe wat. i needa go tru another 1+mth b4 i can rest again.. this sux big time.. common tests. theory exam. approaching me. u noe how scared im.. u dunno lorx. no one noes.. the fear in me..

ive got a headache today.. :) was staring at my theory. dunno how to do.. =X a slacking day.. watched 4episodes of fruits basket. :D yea. d only thing which cheered me up i guess.. :) i like ahjia. hes so cute omg. LOL. really hope he n xiaotou can b together lorx.. :) i cant wait menx. 12 more episodes to go.. gogogo! :D xiaotou so chio! ahjia so shuai! ahhh. but yuki oso not bad laa. but i prefer ah jia. :P this anime is sooo cute jiu shi le. :) mux ty yq for lending me dat vdcs sia. =D i luv her!

well. tml school is starting again.. shld i say i miss my friends. or shld i say i detest gg bac to school..

i choose to remain silent. i choose to be chenmo. i choose to accept everything alone. it hurts..

lianrenweiman.

alone- 8:02 PM

:)

kinda strange.. i dont feel that its cny today.. =X well.. guess im getting more n more imune to holidays. holidays are just days when i can rest and escape from tests and exams. it holds no other meanings? =X

nth much happen today. just that im tired. :) slpt till 8+. wow. strange that im not scolded. :P but i guess tml ll follow the routine le.. =X on the radio. alot of cny songs were on. but i still cant feel anything.. haix. thats life? was trying to do hw. but im soo slack laa.. walao.. how to take olvl lidat.. :(

today is a boring day.. but at least. im happy with what im now. :)

i wan watch fruits basket!

riceball can nv belong to fruits basket..

sadded.

alone- 8:13 PM

happy chinese new year eve! :)

great. the day i longed for arrived. :) however. it ended too fast.. =X

everyone was slping now. and here im. blogging. lolx. today is the only day for me to stay up late w/o getting scolded. so i hafta cherish. this moment..

todae. dad was unexpectedly nice. let me slp till 7.30.. lolx. but yet. im still awfully tired.. was practising piano n doing hw till 10. den. watch doraemon. :P alright im childish. wte. :) luckily rl told me that its on. or i ll miss watching cartoons. it has been long since i last watched cartoons.. or anime? wte. :) at bout 3. we went to grandma's house. :) alot of things changed. including ppl i guess. i realised. i ve been more matured now.. at least i know to clean table. wash bowl. prepare the steamboat. all these w/o being told. :) its time for me to truly grow up.. cuzzin was funny. trying to crack jokes. but.. some i really dunno wat to reply menx. just laugh lorx. =X but. its really a long time since we chat.. my 2 cuzzins n my bro n me was sitting together for dinner. talked. chat. :) nice. i love this feeling. but.. the cat. scared me.. -.- i xia dao den knee hit table de edge. walao.. :( nw my 2 knee cap is injured. damn it.. -.- pain sia.. anw after that we go living room chat. dad mum uncle n auntie's turn to eat. den we play with cats lorx. rofl. cuzzin was using his hp to capture those cats. LOL. n alot of things happen. make me laugh alot. :P after that uncle auntie n mum join in and chat. well. its a rather rare time when we can actually sit down and joke arnd. :) thats what i love bout for cny i guess. the only thing.. went home at about 6.

well.. cny eve is ending soon.. =X 1more hr.. :( cny is coming.. i hope. this new year.. nth bad will happen bahx. i need gd results. i really need.. :(

haix. wish me lucks? =X

well..

wozhiyaonikuaile.. :)

alone- 10:45 PM

tired..

realli exhausted menx..

i kip kana scolded.. yes. im blur. wte. its not my fault that im slpy laa. its not my fault i like to sing. its not my fault i like to do the things i wanna do. its not my fault to b blur..

stop ordering me. stop screaming at me. stop psing me. get lost.

wed. went hm early. plan to slp. but bro came hm. fever.. =X alot of ppl sick menx.. :( but he was still playin com when i reach hm.. -.- anw after i finished bathing. he slpt on my bed. -.- he luk sick.. =X so i din shoo him off. im a gd mei. :) in the end at bout 5 lidat. he woke up. my turn to slp.. slpt for half hr after i realli canot tahan animore.. how i hope i can slp on forever n nv wake up. sometimes.. dreams r much more better than this cruel reality..

today. hmm. not a v nice day.. tired.. lolx. anw. e cny rehersal din realli started. so i went hm at 3 stil.. b4 that i was watching hying n e guys playin wit e sword. rofl. sean is lame. LOL. i was laughing n laughing like mad. yea. loyalty. :) but i guess only afew guys of loyalty r fun bahx.. d others seems dao to me.. =X sadded. tml cant wear civi.. :( walaoeh.. i wan bac mryue!! :( hes so gr8 laa. gif us half days. dun restrict us to bloody hell long socks. let us wear civi. haf bazaar. haf esplanade ting. i so miss him! :( walk hm alone. cuz someone ps me. yes. dis kind of frien. dun wan oso can. :) tuition was slack. :P ate peanut biscuits. pineapple tarts. coca cola sweet. kopi sweet. LOL. :P

well. sometimes. we just hafta get on with life.. may this cny be a reali nice break for me. prob e last hol im gna realli enjoy le..

actions speak more than words..

alone- 8:46 PM

jux returned..

its a really really bz week for me. a really long week.. lucky menx. cny is coming.. :) o wait. i only hope for e cny eve. a no for cny.. =X dont ask me why.. i dunno.

thurs. ji lao shi showed us a ppt. wanting us to realise how xing fu r we. wan us to zhi zu. but.. have you ever wonder? zhi zu. hui chang le mahx? anw. im zhizu for what im now. i just hope things dont get worse.. went home. mum told me smt. xing fu shi zi ji zheng qu de. stunt at dis sentence. erm.. mayb its true.. but.. its impossible for me i guess..

fri. went home alone.. lq sed she got ss remedial. in the end its cancelled but she nv tell me.. =X anw. after that. went for tuition. when back. on the bus i nearly laughed out loud. saw a guy. with a.. lion head? =X his hair sux. told lq on e wae bac. was laughing like mad from one end of the overhead bridge to the other.. LOL. ok its funny. :P

sat. hmm. a realli tiring day for me.. morning went for tuition. after that went for piano. but i reached 20 min earlier. wander arnd aimlessly at east point mall alone.. nothing much to see laa. n it feels weird. fancy walking arnd alone? =X i dun like that feeling.. so i get out n take bus to cher home. bought zj's prezzie on e way back. :) then went back hm eat. den go get award.. mum was crazy. scream n shout at me. at e void deck.. -.- fine. im numb. now u shld noe why i dun like to go out with adults.. it sux. she went down too early and therefore waited v long. then bs me.. walao.. yaya. my fault.

sun. pia hw! was piaing like mad. nv watch tv.. ahhh.

mon. hmm. recalled a song. aiwobiezou. v nice.. :) vocab test was postponed. hai wo trying to memorise like siaox.. its realli a long day..

tues. had 2 tests todae. actually i kinda like today.. cuz no more tests this wk. :) finished all the hw. woot~ :D had cny rehersal today. no comments laa. have fun playing at the backstage though. :P went hm late. mum not happy.. =X anw. went hm wit e guys. they r.. bian tai. -.- though i dun understand what they tokin.. guess its some gross stuffs? hying understand. but im blur.. :(

woyaodexingfushinixingfu..

:)

alone- 7:09 PM

it is raining again..

facing the four walls alone now.. dad and mum go hdb to do some stuffs.. why must the house be so dark now.. and somemore.. no one is with me..

just finished what i think i should do.. wash my socks.. wash my shoes. wash my clothes.. dry my worksheets. dry my newspaper. dry my books. dry my bag.. i hate this rain..

actually i wanted to stay back for the class deco one.. but that julia insisted of pulling me back home.. -.- just then. on the way out of school. an unexpected downpour came.. damn it. she did not bring umbrella.. -.- share with her lorx.. got umbrella = no umbrella.. :) whole bag wet. whole skirt wet. lucky. my uniform only half wet. lolx.. haix.. ws n books wet.. ): sianx laa. bz unpacking the things to dry lorx..

i actually wanted to sleep one.. but..

haix. i dont know eat what medicine sia.. keep sneezing.. mum not at home.. :(

zaozhidaowojiubuhuijiale..

meirenpeihaocanwor..

alone- 3:15 PM

..

woke up at 3am.. cant slp bac.. stare at ceiling. luk out of window.. nth special.. saw dad wake up go toilet.. followed by mum.. but dun tink dey noe im awake laa.. lolx. nw soo tired.. :(

nearly slpt at amaths.. tec teach until so boring laa.. -.- its actuali not so difficult laa.. show e dunno wat heymaths le turn into soo complicated.. dun bother to do e hw.. 2qn nia.. do on foolscap.. -.- waste my paper.. oya. emaths lesson was so free. :) dunno is dat cher forgot change tt or wat. :) he dun come better. luking at idiot spoil my day.. =X

4tests coming dis wk. either 3 tests tml. or 2 tests tml den fri 2 tests.. sianx. im not prepared for it.. i got no confidence.. why mux all this come so soon..

i suddenly like jay alot.. jux feel dat his songs r so sad.. :)

dunno y m i a saddist.. i oso wana noe.. it sux when all my confidence r gone..

ihatemyself.

alone- 5:41 PM

confusing. lost.

wth menx. julia de freaking bk sent chills dwn my spine. it explains everyting. almox completely right. its so. freaking true..

horoscope. do you ever believe in horoscope? i do sometimes. this time. i could not deny the truth that its true somehow.. =X too true..

finally saw e sun today. yet. its still cold.. no rain. :) went hm wit lq. e sun is soo bright n shining. lq took out umbrella. rofl. den we share lorx. :P walking under a umbrella. so romantic omg. LOL. anw. i guess ppl tot we crazi. :) bo bian. too long nv feel e sun. bu xi guan laa. :P

think alot. but i guess. im just crazy bahx. its impossible. bukenengde..

idunnowhattosay..

alone- 8:50 PM

headache..

Single. Despo. Unwanted. ?? -.-

single n unwanted nia. nao despo omg plx.

LOL. rofl.

e ugly duckling..

>.<

alone- 6:52 PM

haix.

i guess im getting more n more slack as days go by.. :( i only bother to finish e homework which hafta hand in e nxt dae.. -.- ahhh. dis cant carry on!! later mux start doing egeog mindmap le.. =X

btw. HARI RAYA HAJI! :) a nice hol which i can slp 1hr longer.. =X

rofl. raining whole dae.. brrrrr. lucky i wore my jacket everywhr i go. :D went to e converse warehouse place. erm.. okok nia. lolx. but alot of ppl. esp aunties. wonder how come aunties oso noe how to look for brands.. =X dey luk at things very rude one laa. flip here n dere den later throw bac.. -.- din bought aniting though.. while lq rl n julia all da bao xiao bao go hm.. :( i wan a converse shoe. 49.90.. -.- so ex lo. lolx. though i noe alrdy discount alot le. but.. anw color not suitable to skool rule. anw c e wallet. actualli oso wan buy. in d end. tink i ll buy e one i like at bugis instead. though its bout 20 bucks.. nvm lo. save money. :) i like e converse jacket oso. :D but.. i got jacket liao. i like e bag oso. 20bucks nia. lolx. but.. i got bag liao. :)

sundae. piano. erm.. cher is very very very disappoint bout me.. i noe.. but.. i realli stupid.. i realli cant learn well.. i realli cant conentrate well.. i dunno wat to do menx..

mon was ok. :) nth much happen. assembly was sianded. cip stuffs.. but we were release early. :D however. rain too big.. cant go hm.. =X dun dare ask friens to longbang.. :( so in d end kana half drench bac to busstop wit lq.. file wet. =X erich v badd laa. ask if lq is my mei. walao. she feb i july. she older laa! :( do i realli luk so old?! ahhhhh. i got so old mahx? ):

haix. hw hw hw undone. sianx. hope tml dun rain menx. i lazy take out umbrella.. :)

i wanna b ugly duckling..

soo cute!

alone- 6:17 PM

poof-

i can feel that history is repeating itself..

it has finally happen.. the thing i dun wanna happen. happen le..

cried silently in the lonely night. no one cares..

woyuelaiyuebuliaojienile..

alone- 12:27 PM

long week..

i hate ppl who despise poly. i hate ppl who despise normal ac. i hate ppl who despise neighbourhood schools. i hate this school..

so what if this is sap school. cant u jux respect everyone if you want ppl to respect you. so what if you are a teacher. so what if you got so many degrees. so what if you got 8subj A1. so what?! i dont gif it a damn. i dont understand why so many teachers have so bad impression on poly laa. does that mean that ppl who go to poly are lousy? what kind of reasoning is that menx.. its so unfair. and so what if ppl go to normal ac. how can you compare us with them? we are all EQUAL. how can u say us behaving like them? arent we all humans? cant we all joke n have fun? -.- and oplx. dont sae we are behaving like an idiot. arent you too tryin to lecture idiots? fcuk off. what kind of cher are you.

pissed today. so what if we are in e top few classes. y do all chers expect us to be clever? no one is perfect laa. damn it. freaked out by this stupid reality.

tues. school reopen. what can i say.. im not used to it lorx.. really tired laa. tues is a slacking day. we had assembly for 2+hr. den play what stupid ice breaking games.. -.- den play e human bingo. alot of ppl tell me sign e one who tink he or she v cute.. -.- walaoeh! not i tink 1 laa. is ppl sae one lorx! rofl. no laa. actualli also nv heard anione sae b4. or rather i dun wan remember. :) its too long ago..

wed. day as usual lorx. first day of studying. alrdy got alot of hw.. whole dae blur blur gong gong.. actualli wan go hm slp de.. but horx.. hafta do hw. in d end no time nap.. =X anw. ty kor. :) he help me burn my proj into cd while my own real blooded bro din bother to help.

thurs. is a lucky dae. i got a nice locker. :) n i manage to haf 45 min to nap. =X at least not dat tired le after dat. :) do hw after dat lorx.. usual school day. no much diff.

fri. today. tuition. after that tuition cher longbang us out. :D save 45cents. rofl. hmm. otherwise. everyting is still e same. jux that mood nao so gd laa.. dunno why.. kinda sad laa. i also dunno why seriously.. prob is tink too much le bahx..

i seriously detest silence-

we are people from 2 different worlds.

its impossible..

alone- 8:44 PM

ahhhh.

skool starting tml. sux. hafta wake up at 5.30 again.. :(

dis sux big time. tests. i havent read ani yet.. ahhhh.
i still wana slp menx. i dun like dis yr.. olvl.. :(

haix. life is gna b bz again. nitemare starting.. luckily.
i still haf my hp. :)

haiouheyuxiangai. zhishiyichangyiwai..

yujianni. shiwozuimeilideyiwai..

:)

alone- 9:30 PM

-begining of 2oo6-

a new begining for me. a new life.

i want to start anew. to be a better girl. to be a better friend. to be a better me. from now on.

i hope time dont flies.. time can drown alot of promises. fade my memories. demolish my dreams.. all i want is just to lead a simple life.. isit so hard?

deleted alot of smses. from you. i believe. nice smses will come back. if im worth it.. though i noe the answer is a never. its too late for me to regret now.. i just hope that theres still someone out there who care for me..

do wishes come true?

alone- 9:31 PM

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